FAMILY

What is the family devotion?

When we think of loyalty, our minds often conjure images of chivalry. Rooted in grand principles and noble promises, loyalty epitomizes positive virtues, deep commitment, and humanistic values. On paper, loyalty drives us toward greater unity and integrity. It compels us, elevates us, and instills strength—the kind that comes from being part of something larger, almost transcending ourselves. In some cases, loyalty might even be influenced by theological principles, where the divine intuitively guides our fate based on tenets set forth millennia ago. Originating from an uncertain source, like a booming voice shattering the skies, proclaiming a universal loyalty to life, or more precisely, to an idea of life. Thus, when discussing loyalty, it seems essential to approach it with a degree of questioning and caution. Far be it from me to challenge every inkling of reverence toward loyalty. However, special attention must be paid to family loyalty, especially when it subtly permeates our daily life, often unnoticed.

The Virtue of Family Loyalty

Before worrying about the potential harm family loyalty could inflict on our daily actions, it's crucial to recognize that in many cases, it brings considerable energy. Being loyal to one's family can have immensely positive repercussions on personal development, as well as understanding within the family, oneself, and interpersonal relationships. Autonomy is inherently linked to the role of family loyalty, whether in providing reassurance or leading to wayward cohesiveness. For instance, when a father teaches his child that helping others is a noble act but simultaneously instills the importance of thoughtful giving, autonomy rightfully asserts itself, solidifying a wholesome family loyalty. While generally, it is respectable and respected to promote the idea of helping others, it is debatable to extend help to every needy individual, friend, family member, or acquaintance seeking assistance. Sometimes, doing so could even risk one's financial stability for the sake of family doctrine. In the example mentioned, if parental authority initially allows for independent thought, it becomes deeply ingrained that members of this family habitually assist those in need in a healthy, considered, and proportionate manner. Such a view of strong, yet autonomously flexible family loyalty naturally attaches one to their family as a steadfast and unbreakable support, proudly carried under the family banner. This ancestrally validated and calibrated approach provides family members with a solid foundation, marked by a powerful identity seal.

Intrusive but Accepted

Not all family loyalty is about autonomy and personal evaluation. In many cases, it's an unyielding will, guided by vague precepts. It can border on manipulative rather than humanistic benevolence. For instance, a grandmother's insistence on punctuality, interpreted as arriving an hour early for appointments, can become oppressive. Such inflexibility can disrupt family dynamics and potentially be transmitted across generations.

Manipulation and Loyalty

Living under the weight of family loyalty is challenging. It can provide stability but also be painful to uphold. In some instances, family loyalty can stem from perceived rejection, leading to self-imposed obligations disconnected from societal expectations or personal validation. For example, a man might continue a family tradition despite feeling alienated due to his sexuality, hoping to maintain a connection with his rejecting family. This demonstrates how family loyalty can form a crucial part of one's filial identity and self-concept.

Subtle yet Present

Finally, some family loyalty habits are so ingrained they go unnoticed, yet they significantly impact daily life. These include shopping at the same supermarket despite disliking its offerings, using the same tools associated with humiliating memories, or being unfailingly polite even when disrespected. To distinguish whether an action is influenced by family loyalty or genuine interest, one should listen to their emotional responses rather than rationalize. Understanding the difference between a habit inherited from family loyalty and one's true preferences can be challenging, but it's crucial for personal authenticity.